i saw my grandfather lucid twice after he got ill. The first time, i went to get my father for my mother. She was in the car with a horrible migraine and she needed my father. i couldn't bear to make her go out into the bright sunlight so i went in to get him. my father was in the bathroom and i stood just inside my grandfather's doorway waiting for him. Suddenly he looked up at me and recognized me. "Livey, my little cunt," he whispered. i backed away, but he caught my wrist with surprising speed. "What's the matter, you don't want to be my cunt any more? You think you can be anything else? Never. Never." He drew me towards him and i wanted to resist but was afraid to. Then my father was in the doorway. "Daddy, you let my girl go. Leave her alone, and _______, what are you doing in here?" i ran past my father back to the car, and heard my grandfather laughing behind me. Daddy followed me out the car and spoke to my mother. Both of us pretended nothing had happened.
