Sorry, i didn't give you the end of the story. Its been a wild week. Let me give it now, then i have another post that i'm cross posting everywhere.
Soon enough my mother summarized the file of test results for me. i don't remember the whole depressing list of damage and poor prognosis. Let's just say i'm healthier than it was expected. And, i'm not very damn healthy. And, of course, they decided my mental health must be damaged too. So they sent me to a shrink. He was a portly man with salt and pepper hair. He always had a paperclip in his hand and he demolished them. As soon as one was bent beyond playing with, he'd pick up another. i wasn't telling this guy a damn thing. He made me feel like a freak. And, the way he tried to engage me with toys and books and such gave me the creeps. my concept of male female relationships were screwed and i was scared of him. i wanted him to leave me the fuck alone. i quickly found that the best way to keep distance from him was to sit in the chair across from his desk and refuse to move from it or speak. After a few months he gave up and told my parents i wasn't ready.
