Outside the door i braced to shoot whoever opened the door. i knew it would likely be someone that i had no reason to kill and that it would bother me. i also knew if i didn't kill them they would simply kill me and there would be no chance of killing Edward. And, i badly wanted to take him with me. i thought there was a good chance that if i even managed to wound Edward that at least some of the girls might go free. And, then my life would have some purpose. And, oh fuck that. i just wanted to hurt him. i couldn't bring myself to hate John because he had worn the chains i wore as a kid. But, Edward i hated with a passion. i wanted him dead. i would settle for injured. i knew i'd probably die before he got a scrape, but, i couldn't resist. i've always been dramatic. i knocked. And to my utter amazement Edward opened the door himself with a curt, "What the fuck?" He was alone. i could smell the sex and quickly realized he had been training the new girl only a short time before. That was probably why Marty hadn't fought me about my lie. i brushed the considerations away as soon as i ascertained she wasn't in the room and jammed the gun against the base of his throat, clicking the safety off with one smooth motion. "Who is coming and when are they coming?" He reached for the gun. i pulled the hammer back. "Go ahead," his fingers froze. He stared at me in horror, "mother fucker. After i'm done blowing out your brains, i'm going to go down the hall and fuck {his daughter} with this gun. i'm going to walk out of here with her, and you know they'll let me go if i have the gun to her head. Do you think she's a virgin? She won't be for long, cause i'm gonna take her to Sugar's with me. And, she can go to that fucking warehouse! She can fucking go to that hell on earth. Everything you've done to me, i've already done to her. i've already done it, you son of a bitch!" i realized my voice was rising and i kicked the door closed. He stared at me like he had never seen such a creature as me. i suppose he hadn't. i'm sure no girl of his had ever threatened his daughter. i knew i was dead, but i didn't care one whit. It was worth it to see the genuine fear in his eyes. "Raven, please. What do you want? What do you want, for fuck's sake?" i considered telling him i wanted the last two years of my life back. That i wanted my son back. That i wanted April and Ebony and all the other girls back. Impossible things. i considered telling him that because i really wanted to kill him and i was pretty far gone in not caring about my life. But, some part of me wanted to survive and so i said, "Freedom. i want you to let me walk out of here. i want to be Suzy High School." Just then there was a knock at the door.
